Finding Success and Happiness

I’m good at a lot of things across multiple fields and I enjoy learning about almost anything….renovation, real estate, marketing and public relations, gift wrapping, crafts, hair, makeup, writing and a lot of behind the scenes and admin type work…. But, just because I was and am good at so many things doesn’t mean that’s where my talent lies.

Transparency Moment

In my last year of my twenties, I’ve been really trying to make the best of it. Primarily by honing in on my passion and purpose because like many of us, I’ve wondered aimlessly through my twenties, trying to shoot my shot, being lost and confused….and that same repetitive cycle. Suuuuure, that’s what “they” say your twenties are for, but I mean honestly, can I cut the fluff for $2,000 Alex?  (Seriously, I know it was all meant for this season i’m in right now!) To ME, it seemed like I had more losses than gains…until I decided to change my perspective and direction at 28.  I’ve mentioned before how I landed the job I thought I really wanted and HATED IT and ended up in a dwarfed state of conformity and stagnation, for yearsTHAT in itself was a direct contradiction to who I was as I person and I was miserable because of it.  I wouldn’t find the cure to being miserable and abusing my life until I decided to listen, obey and follow my purpose.

If you’ve been following my blog Phenomenl Woman, you’ll notice that i’ve gone through a branding and site identity change.  I started out writing to release my feelings, share my story, to be transparent with you and share money saving tips by thrifting and the coordinating “OOTD’s”.  You see, what had happened was…. it morphed evolved into a business that I had no intentions of (because I came from corporate life).  It wasn’t until (after years of hearing it) a mentor and super phenomenal woman saw in me that I was searching and miserable and that I didn’t like my job. She really pushed my inners to figure out and pursue my passion.  In addition, every time I wore something thrifted and stylish, she’d say things like “I should be shopping for other women, that’s my gift/talent”Some strange way, destiny would align itself and give me the time needed to focus and listen, because I wasn’t. Afraid (and without a choice), I did.  I’ve been personal shopping and styling clients for several months now…and I love it.  I’d been doing it for free for YEARS, unknowingly and unconsciously sowing into my purpose.  But you see, it’s more than that for me.

Until a solid 22, I lacked a lot of confidence and was very timid and because of personal experiences and trauma, I had a really difficult time receiving love (love, compliments, hugs…anything). Styling someone for me is reinventing and renovating.  I can inject love and confidence in areas that people lack.  I love it, it stretches me and it validates me.  Sometimes and oftentimes, others can identify our gift in us, especially if we’re blind to it.  She wasn’t the first or the last; there have been countless angels attempting to get me on my path for years, but I had to re-align my thought process, change my definition of success, uncover my own potential (and believe it) and what others would think of me…especially leaving not one, but two super legit jobs.

Spiritual and Secular Success

I’d been praying and praying (and crying, begging, weeping) about something that was innate from the beginning, but it had to be matured and harvested.  Not only that, I had a mentality of “well, God should just make it happen for me” and that’s obviously not the type Teacher He is.  I wanted both types of successes– spiritual and secular, but I didn’t know how to obtain both without one suffering.  By obedience, sacrifice and SERVING (parents, ministry, job, nieces, friends, etc.), things began to fall in place.  This year alone, by reclaiming my time and following the instructions to my plan I figured out the first few steps in obtaining both types of success.  I had to “do it afraid” and without knowing every step of the way.  I had to rely on my talent, previous skills and trust that my plan would work for me.  I had to get disciplined and serious about what I wanted to do because someone is waiting on me to transform their life.  I had to not negotiate with fear and most certainly unconcern myself with others thoughts of my decisions, lifestyle choices and sacrifices.  

All of these things i’d been grappling with were coincidently for such a time as this and covered in the the new book, The Hollywood Commandments by Devon Franklin.  This book outlines his journey as a person of faith with wild success in one of the most tumultuous career communities: Hollywood.  The principles outlined are practical and realistic, yet they are based in moral and spiritual principles that’ll easily fit into whatever your career path is.

I’ve read the book and i’ve got a several to giveaway because I KNOW it’s going to help you get serious and disciplined.  Here are the instructions to enter into the giveaway:

  1. Following @charissestyles on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. (All can be found clicking links or over there —> )
  2. SUBSCRIBE to my blog by entering your email address. (I promise, I don’t send out spam, multiple emails or will share it.  I don’t OWN my social media, but I do OWN this site 😜)
  3. On either platform listed (on your posts or in the comments below), share something you hope to achieve and/or overcome or even sacrifice in the final quarter of this year that is going to contribute to your success and tag @charissestyles @devonfranklin use HASHTAG #charissestylesdevon AND and #thehollywooodcommandments SO BOTH OF US CAN SEE IT!!!! (I can’t find your post if your profile is private or if you don’t use the # ……and maybe he may need me to style him in the future 💃🏾)

The giveaway ends in OCTOBER 8 at NOON (EST) and i’ll announce the WINNERS on my social media! 

Check this out while you’re here:

I got Devon Franklin and Meagan Good believing in God’s plan for my life.  I most certainly am believing in yours too!!!!

11 thoughts on “Finding Success and Happiness

  1. Kelle Jones says:

    I love this blog post! One thing I would like to over come is my lack of confidence! Specifically lack of confidence in my craft! I am a new full time entrepreneur and I’ve noticed that sometimes I do not ask for what I want from my clients who are Price hagglers , due to self doubt. I’ve experienced this feeling multiple times and it ends up screwing me over because I end up doing the same amount of work for half the pay. There are two reason why I do this, #1.) I fear if I don’t accept their offer, then I will lose them as a client and I can’t afford to do that #2.) I look at where I am on the ladder of growth, and I know I have a lot to work on, and I’m a newbie, so I need to accept what they can offer me because “at least they see a little value in me”!
    God confidence is what defeats all self doubt, and in the most humble way possible !! So yeah that’s what I’m working on for the remainder of the year, HEAVY!!! This will bring me closer to success!! 🙌🏽#charissestylesdevon

    Liked by 1 person

    • charissesstyles says:

      Wow, thank you for your candor!!! I’ve been grappling with fear of a lot of things, but i’ve learned that the only thing that can stop my purpose or plan from moving in action is Fear and my inability to act. Definitely a great boost of self accountability!!!


  2. Ayrica says:

    Love You!!!
    Very proud of you for “doing it afraid” my goal is to finish my book on surrendering to God. To be honest I’m afraid but I’m determined to do it anyway. Thanks for the encouragement to keep going.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. SmishyV says:

    I am not exactly sure which statement has been used to address me more for the past 27 years
    ‘ You are too spoiled” or “your pride is going to kill you”. My reaction as always “oh well” we got to go one way or the other.
    Until about 20 seconds ago (NOT EXACTLY, but I’ve been ignoring it until now) …. #WhyAreYouChoosingToDoThisNowJesus #ImIndependent #IGotThis
    I have always known I’d have to learn to discipline my emotions one day or it would lead me down a path (that I tell myself I am woman enough to handle if it ever comes to that) I truly don’t want to trod.
    My pride has started to grow a cataract over my bigger picture in life. I find myself obsessing over my life and the way it should be and then worry some more rather than actually living my life, I mean truly LIVING my life. Instead, this results in me becoming incredibly lost and confused.
    #IWantAGoodLife #IWantToBeHappy I am ready to know why am I truly here on this earth, What am I doing, Why does it matter, I need to know what is my true purpose. #SuperSigh #TheMomentOfTruth
    The first step to getting those answers and living the life I truly want = me overcoming the fear of letting go of my pride and arrogance. #ItsEasierSaidThanDone But #IWantToTryMyBest for the last quarter of 2017. #charissestylesdevon #thehollywooodcommandments

    Liked by 1 person

    • charissesstyles says:

      This is so…..transparent and I believe….I know that’ll you’ll overcome whatever pride you feel is holding you back. I’ve succumbed to the same internal pressures, and the first step to overcoming it was admitting it to myself that I had no idea what was going on and why everything and relationship around me seemed to reveal the same results. It’s definitely NOT easy but we have to be transparent with ourselves and the Lord to take that fear and arrogance of knowing more that him away from us. You’re on your way sister!


  4. jclay0410 says:

    Great blog Charisse!!! The one thing I plan to achieve is being more discipled in the word of God and spending more time with God. I plan on starting my own business one day and I definitely want to be lead by God in doing it. I don’t want to step outside of his will for my life. So I’ve been asking God to lead me and connect me to the right people because I know God was the one who gave me this business idea. I honestly have been sacrificing more of my time in between being a mother of 5 with a 3 month old, a wife and a full time job. It’s hard work but I know I can do and I trust God to help me make it happen… especially since I don’t know where to start. I do have my vision though. My biggest goal is to work for God edifying the kingdom of God. I know through my business and brand God will allow me to do that soon! 😃@charissestyles @devonfranklin #charissestylesdevon #thehollywooodcommandments

    Liked by 1 person

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